4 Top Tips on How to Want Less
“Wanting less is a better blessing than having more.” -Mary Ellen Edmunds
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Even after choosing to live with less and purposely clearing out much of our unused and unwanted things, I noticed that I was still gathering together piles, bags, and boxes of things that needed to be donated every few months. I was constantly having to de-clutter.
It eventually occurred to me that creating a simpler home had to be pursued on two different fronts. I had learned the skill of de-cluttering, but I realized that I also had to stop the influx of things into our home or I was just repeating the same vicious cycle of buying stuff, feeling overwhelmed, and then getting rid of stuff. A simpler home is found when you can be content with less, but that can be hard to do in a world that always pushes us to want more.
TIPS ON HOW TO WANT LESS
1. THINK THROUGH PURCHASES
Over time, I learned to ask myself questions before I bought something new. Did I really love it or was it a passing fad that I would quickly get over? Where would I put it? Could we get along without it? Did we really need it? Could I borrow it from someone else? After pausing to ask myself these questions, I would often realize that I wanted a tidy, uncluttered home more than I wanted whatever new thing I was considering. I also started becoming more content with the things we had (because I had thoughtfully chosen them) and shopping for new things became less of a temptation (since I already loved what I owned). I still buy things we want, I just think more deeply about it first and try to make sure it’s not going to end up in the donation box in a few months.
Pacific Natural Book / Flat sheet / Fitted sheet
2. SHOP ONLINE
Years ago, I got into a habit of doing more of my shopping online rather than in stores. It was during a busy time in my life when I was carpooling my kids to two different schools, fulfilling parent volunteer hours, and running kids to physical therapy and orthodontist appointments. Trying to get to the grocery store for food or to Target for household items was hard to squeeze into the middle of my busy days. So I started ordering online and having things shipped to my door. And I noticed that I was buying and spending less because random things weren’t ending up in my shopping cart. I mean who doesn’t go into Target for one thing and then come out with a cart full of things you didn’t even know you wanted?! But if you make a list of what you need, shop online, and stick to the list, you’re less likely to give into temptation and buy impulsively. The same is true if you need a new sweater or pair of jeans. Rather than going to the mall and being faced with temptation everywhere you look, try shopping online.
3. INVEST IN QUALITY
When we buy quick, thoughtless, or cheap products, they usually don’t last and then they end up as junk and clutter in our home. We made this mistake quite a bit in the early years of marriage, homemaking, and parenting. In an effort to save money, we bought cheap furniture, cheap clothes, and cheap toys. My initial thought process was that the more I could get for our money, the better. But we ended up with a house full of junky toys, furniture we didn’t really like, shoes that were uncomfortable to wear, and clothes that either stretched out, pilled, or shrunk after a few washes. And then we needed to purchase new items to replace the cheaper worn-out ones.
We finally learned that it was wiser to invest more money into a longer-lasting, quality product. This meant that I started buying less clothes and shoes for our family, but the ones I bought fit better and lasted longer. It meant that my kids got less presents for Christmas and birthdays, but the presents they did get were thoughtfully chosen, loved more, and lasted longer. It meant we tried to buy well made furniture that served our family well and hopefully would last for a long time. When we invest in thoughtfully chosen, quality items, I’ve found that we’re much more content and satisfied with our purchases for the long run.
4. HAVE A VISION AND STICK WITH IT
Since settling into this home, I’ve realized how little I switch things up or shop for home decor. I have felt content. This has been a little bit surprising to me because in past homes, I was always doing new projects, painting and re-painting walls or furniture, re-decorating, re-arranging, and constantly switching out our everyday (and seasonal) home decor. Instagram and Pinterest kept me constantly inspired to buy new things or try out different decor styles. It was a never ending cycle.
Then we lived in an Airbnb for an entire year. Without a home to decorate, I began to dream and focus on my vision for our next home. That time I spent planning and writing down my vision kept me focused when it came time to make purchasing decisions for this home. And because I had a vision and stuck to it, it paid off in deeper feelings of contentment and rest within our home. You don’t have to completely re-do a home to find that contentment though. It starts with taking some time to decide how you want your home (or a room) to look. What colors/styles do you love? What do you want your home to feel like? What is the purpose of each space in your home? Once you know what you do want in your home, you will also know what you don’t want in your home. And you’ll be less likely to impulsively buy decor or furniture on a whim that you will regret later.
Simplifying your home is a process. You learn as you go. And learning how to want less is just one more step in the right direction of creating a beautiful, simple home you love.
